Lost in the moment..

Trapped in a moment of overwhelming responsibilities, I sit here confused yet calm. To escape, I assume. Writing is my path of walk when there is no other step so comforting and relaxing. One task, then another, accumulating endlessly until there is no eye to see the world beyond. Almost inescapable. Almost, but not quite. I guess it is at times as such when one begins pondering the depths of life. Is this purely just a matter of intrigue or perhaps another face of procrastination? Nonetheless, it's a time of great thought, probably the best self advice comes when there are numerous things impending at my mind. And here, I will attempt to organise my unkempt thoughts into fathomable words, my mind seeping through nothing but an arrangement letters.

Tonight. A time I had not imagined yet a time that is nearing too fast. Potential fear? Or maybe just uncertainty. I do not know. There is however an undeniable and painstakingly constant reality rushing to make a grand entrance. I constantly remind myself, you are not ready to take on the world you imagine, you still have a long way to go. But do I really? Or is this just me protecting myself from the wide expanse of truth that has no guaranteed safety nor happiness? Oh, how I imagine, the days when responsibility shall not drive me instead an uncompromising desire fulfilling my true passions. I think that's quite it. I do not wish to be pushed under circumstances where my heart does not belong. Instead, a longing. A longing for doing doing good, relieving my soul of the unquenched thirst it so desperately yearns.   

But. There's always a but. This fast paced life leaves no time to think. To contemplate the truth. Perhaps in finding and appreciating the true purpose will this void be filled. Is this the secret? To constantly have an array of things waiting for completion in order to remember and appreciate the true purpose of one's self? I will never know. For now, I understand. I understand the desperate need for appreciating and accepting, learning and growing, walking and believing. It is only when my heart understands will the words in my mind begin to flow in cohesion.