First Day of Forever 210620
I realised this a while ago and I knew I had to let go. I was always reluctant to put it into writing because I knew that that minute I wrote it down, it became real and it meant that I could not lie to myself or escape it anymore. And this is hard. It is so freaking hard. It's so much easier to hold on to what you are familiar with even if it hurts you, because at least there is certainty and you know what's going to happen next, even if it's not what you want. Letting go means having to face uncertainty. And that uncertainty can mean growth, but it also can mean pain and having to start again from square one. It means I have to unlearn everything that I have learnt over the last few years. It means I have to think about the impact of all of those years on my mental health, and forgive myself so that I have the chance to move on. It's so easy to be like YEP this is the moment that I am going to make that change in my life and go forward, but it's not easy. It's